I went to church every week for the first sixteen years of my life. Unfortunately, even after all that time I didn’t have a biblical understanding of who God is. I memorized some Bible verses, but my life was never changed by the gospel. I am sure my parents and teachers would tell you how nice I was, but, I was only nice so I could impress other people. Honoring God was not the most important thing in my life. I didn’t know what it meant to be a follower of Christ. I honestly thought that following Christ meant not swearing, working hard to get good grades, and not drinking beer. But in fact, I really stayed away from “bad things” because I thought it would help me become more successful in life. I wanted to be successful. I didn’t realize how good God’s glory is. I lived for the feeling of being applauded by other people. I had no idea that “God opposes the proud…”(James 4:6) and he hates it when people pretend to be Christian. In my mind, the Bible was just a good moral book and I thought I could pick and choose what I wanted to obey. But, by Biblical standards I was still a sinner who needed forgiveness. And I completely missed the fact that God deeply wanted to have a relationship with me.
As I moved on to high school, I still had the same vision of life. I was still focused on being a “good person.” My heart’s desire was for me to get into a good college and to have a girlfriend. My senior year I had what I wanted: I knew I would be going to UCLA and I had the girl of my dreams. And guess what? It wasn’t enough. It was not enough to satisfy me. I could not completely depend on my education, because nor matter how much I learned, there was always someone smarter. I could never enjoy my hard work because I was always comparing myself to other people. And when I got into arguments with my girlfriend, I was so sad because the one person I loved so much would say hurtful things about me if she was angry.
It was around this time, that God used one of my high school friends to bring me to a church were the Bible was preached as the Word of God. People took the Bible seriously. And this changed me. I think my parents were also able to notice the change happening in my life. I saw other Christians acting like the Christians described in the Bible. They were actually fighting their sin. Through this experience God saved me. I learned that, more important than being a nice person, God wanted me to worship Him from my heart. Psalms 51:17 says, “A broken and contrite heart, O God, You will not despise.” I did not care about what others thought of me, but I started to care more about what God said in the Bible. Also, for maybe the first time in my life I realized that loving others was more satisfying than focusing on myself. Considering how selfish I was before, this was a huge change in my life!
Ultimately the gospel of Jesus Christ is what changed me. The gospel message was no longer a story, but a personal invitation to join Christ, as a son of God. This invitation came to me when I was furthest from God. I only wanted college and a girl, not God. Romans 5:6 says, “For while we were still helpless, at the right time Christ died for the ungodly….” On July 28th 2011, I remember sitting in my room, at my desk, thinking about all the things I would not longer chase so that I could have God. I made a promise to God that day that I would no longer live for my temporary and oftentimes foolish desires, but to live for His. I have decided to trust that Jesus Christ came to Earth from Heaven in order to die for the sins of those who believe in Him. His physical resurrection from the grave proves that He has conquered death and can just as easily raise Christians and take them to a perfect dwelling place with Himself. My hope is no longer in the fleeting pleasures of this world, but in that one day Christ will come back be joined with His people.
As I moved on to high school, I still had the same vision of life. I was still focused on being a “good person.” My heart’s desire was for me to get into a good college and to have a girlfriend. My senior year I had what I wanted: I knew I would be going to UCLA and I had the girl of my dreams. And guess what? It wasn’t enough. It was not enough to satisfy me. I could not completely depend on my education, because nor matter how much I learned, there was always someone smarter. I could never enjoy my hard work because I was always comparing myself to other people. And when I got into arguments with my girlfriend, I was so sad because the one person I loved so much would say hurtful things about me if she was angry.
It was around this time, that God used one of my high school friends to bring me to a church were the Bible was preached as the Word of God. People took the Bible seriously. And this changed me. I think my parents were also able to notice the change happening in my life. I saw other Christians acting like the Christians described in the Bible. They were actually fighting their sin. Through this experience God saved me. I learned that, more important than being a nice person, God wanted me to worship Him from my heart. Psalms 51:17 says, “A broken and contrite heart, O God, You will not despise.” I did not care about what others thought of me, but I started to care more about what God said in the Bible. Also, for maybe the first time in my life I realized that loving others was more satisfying than focusing on myself. Considering how selfish I was before, this was a huge change in my life!
Ultimately the gospel of Jesus Christ is what changed me. The gospel message was no longer a story, but a personal invitation to join Christ, as a son of God. This invitation came to me when I was furthest from God. I only wanted college and a girl, not God. Romans 5:6 says, “For while we were still helpless, at the right time Christ died for the ungodly….” On July 28th 2011, I remember sitting in my room, at my desk, thinking about all the things I would not longer chase so that I could have God. I made a promise to God that day that I would no longer live for my temporary and oftentimes foolish desires, but to live for His. I have decided to trust that Jesus Christ came to Earth from Heaven in order to die for the sins of those who believe in Him. His physical resurrection from the grave proves that He has conquered death and can just as easily raise Christians and take them to a perfect dwelling place with Himself. My hope is no longer in the fleeting pleasures of this world, but in that one day Christ will come back be joined with His people.